NO PILL FOR LONELINESS
He withdrew to lonely places and prayed (Luke 5:16)
What does loneliness sound like? I asked this question on Twitter recently. You might expect that people would say “silence,” but they didn’t. Their answers included:
The wind whistling in my chimney, because I only ever hear it when I’m alone.
The hubbub of a pub heard when the door opens to the street.
The sound of a clicking radiator as it comes on or off.
The terrible din of early morning birds in suburban trees.
I suspect everyone has a sound associated with loneliness and personal alienation. Mine is the honk of Canadian geese, which takes me back to life as a 20-year-old student, living in halls after a break-up.
These sounds highlight that the experience of loneliness varies from person to person—something that is not often recognized in our modern panic. We are in an “epidemic;” a mental health “crisis.” In 2018 the British government was so concerned that it created a “Minister for Loneliness”. Countries like Germany and Switzerland may follow suit. This language imagines that loneliness is a single, universal state—it is not. Loneliness is an emotion cluster—it can be
made up of a number of feelings, such as anger, shame, sadness, jealousy, and grief.
The loneliness of a single mother on the breadline, for example, is very different to that of an elderly man whose peers have died, or a teenager who is connected online but lacks offline friendships. And rural loneliness is different to urban loneliness.
By talking about loneliness as a virus or an epidemic, we medicalize it and seek simple, even pharmacological treatments. This year researchers announced that a “loneliness pill” is in the works. This move is part of a broader treatment of emotions as mental health problems, with interventions focusing on symptoms not causes...READ MORE
