A column with an ecumenical perspective.

DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER

Q: Dear Rabbi Gellman, thank you for your amazing and sorely needed ministry.

I would like you to share your thoughts on the habit of our current culture to “read a book by its cover”. Of course, the age-old saying is "Never judge a book by its cover”, but everywhere I turn these days, I feel people are paying too much attention to the appearance of a person or situation and not trying to consider the true character, feelings, needs of people and the meaning of their words.

The problem is pervasive in social media, TikTok, television, politics, even in our churches. Everything is a show; it’s entertainment. I have always believed that God not only knows our actions but also knows our motivations in our hearts. I think of the scripture that says, "When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men … but when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father who is unseen.”

This says to me that prayer is not about the “show”. And I believe that faith is more important than deeds. It’s all about what is in our hearts, not the appearance of our actions. Do you agree? If so, do you think we are going down a new wrong path or is it the normal human condition?

Thank you! – (From M in Gainesville, Florida)

A: Thank you, dear M, for your kind words. You raise two deep and big questions: Is everything a show? And what does it mean to pray?

I do not believe that everything is a show. I do not believe that all books are judged by their covers.

What is clearly true is that we are surrounded not only by pretense and shallowness but also by true love from people who love us more than life. The fact that the media presents an endless parade of foolishness and cruelty does not mean that this is a true picture of life.

One of the purposes of religion is to stand against the worst elements of secular culture and call us to a higher, better and more sacrificial life. Mother Teresa had a business card that she once gave to my pal, Father Tom. It had no phone number on it and it had no email address. It just had her name and these words, “Happiness is the natural fruit of duty.”

Our secular culture often teaches that happiness is the natural fruit of selfishness and material acquisitiveness. I choose to follow Mother Teresa’s vision that by doing our duty to those in need around us we will find the highest form of human happiness. That duty begins with our families and extends outward into the world to those who sleep in the dust...read more